Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Pitiful poetry

Yes, I have more pitiful poetry for you to peruse.

This was for my vocabulary quiz to demonstrate free verse

This poetry test is so very hard
My mind wants to wander
South Park plays in the background
It amuses me not
Jack in the Box is not scary
The King from Burger King is
I should be studying
Where did I leave? my shoe?
Did I check the mail today
The test
Concentrate on the test

This one was to demonstrate metaphor

My mind is a steel sieve
That strains the juice
And keeps the meaty bits
Of my memories

This one was to demonstrate connotation

I must be connected
Wire me now
Stabilize my ports
Insert my cables
Increase my bandwidth
Celebrate my uploads
Have pity on my downloads
Never leave me wireless
Connect, connect, connect

And this one was to demonstrate parody. We had to parody "my love is a red, red rose" (look it up, you're online anyway, google is just a few clicks away)

O, my cold is like a red, red, nose
From which the snot doth flow
And fills my tissue
Every time I blow

An intoxicant fills up my glass
I love thee, Nyquil
And I will love you even more
When my body is tranquil

My cough grows harsh, oh dear
My head pounds once again
I take more of you sweet Nyquil
And a tiny shot of gin

Bright and lively, I put
You back upon your shelf
Til once again I feel the need
To medicate myself

This one was one of my homework poems is supposed to employ slant rhymes (Look it up. Do I look like google to you? Okay maybe a little around the eyes but still) WARNING - The following poem has a very adult word at the end that may offend some people

Happy Ending
Kelli Reynolds

It’s been a while
Since I was a child
Toys I no lover have
Rocks I no longer save

Open no longer
Is my heart
I do not linger
Dreaming by the hearth

No longer do I wait
For the princely promise
Promises too sweet
I know to dismiss

My views may be extreme
Perhaps I am jaded
But men will say anything
To be properly fellated

This is my other homework poem and I may have slightly plagiarized a tweet I did several months ago

Homework Haiku

I sit at my desk
I stare blankly at my wall
And think of nothing

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